Eight Hundred & Twenty Six

Theme: Heartless!

I went into work today and went to hand over as usual. There was a new care plan for a patient. When she self harms (bangs her head, cuts herself, puts things in her eye) we aren't allowed to intervene. Just watch her do it. I fucking hate this patient. She's the bane of my work existence but to watch someone self harm in front of me and knowing I'm not doing anything to prevent it will just kill me. The reasons why they have put this care plan in place does make sense as far as personality disorders go and I do agree with it to a certain extent, especially after working with this patient. However, I'm going to find it so difficult just standing there like a muppet, when my natural instinct is to help, and care. I won't lie, it made me cry when I was told. I do struggle with the idea of not helping her. Although, not helping her, is actually helping her. It's her personality disorder, the attention she craves.

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