One Thousand Four Hundred & Twenty Four

Theme: Weight

I feel as though I'm gaining so much weight. I want to get back on track but I need that push of motivation to do it. I'd love to go swimming again. I miss it. I'm scared of how much it is going to kill me when I go on holiday. I'm hideous.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Seven Hundred & Forty Five

Theme: I'm liked!....oh wait. I finally had a shift where everyone likes me. Well, all the patients anyway. Tonight, I feel like the staff are doing nothing but bitching about me. It's making me feel unhappy and uneasy. They keep whispering and now I know how bad it makes the patients feel. It makes me feel paranoid and on edge. Like everything I'm doing is the wrong thing. I feel fat, disgusting, worthless and lazy. That's how I feel they see me. I want to go home, crawl in bed and cry. I'm on shift with two people that I find really intimidating. So it's making it all really difficult. I just feel like I haven't got a place here tonight and that all I do is sit here when that isn't the case. That's why every five seconds I'm like "do you want a drink? Anything you want me to do?" I'm so far up everyone's arse because I just feel so worthless in there eyes. Fuck me, you know you need a day off when....
Read more

One Thousand Four Hundred & Ninety Three

Theme: Gastric Band I don't think I've mentioned this but I've decided to have the gastric band. Me and my mum have been toying with the idea for a while now and it's a definite go ahead. We will be doing it early next year. Get Christmas out the way and we will have the money together to go for the operation privately. I'm nervous about it but hey ho. I'm looking forward to it. I think emotionally it won't help, I'll always see myself as a disgusting individual but I don't know. Whatever, yknow? I'm getting it to be healthier, I've been dieting since I was in primary school. I'll look better I'm not doubting that.
Read more

Two Hundred & One

Image
Theme: Erotica Today has been spent writing erotica. I won't lie, it's been really fun. I might actually publish to amazon. Well I hope to anyway. For some reason I've written a heterosexual erotica rather then homosexual one. I think I decided to do it that way simply because it is so much easier. Although I'm having loads of fun, it is really hard to write. Not because of the lack of ideas, but because there are so many of them. No wonder why in movies you always see writers with some sort of alcoholic beverage next to them. I really need some more people to just have a glance of it before I decide to publish it. So if you're reading this, please please contact me! I need suggestions! I decided to write it because I was reading some already published one's online and they seemed so crap when it came to description and there wasn't really a scene setting. I figured I'd just write one to see how I would get on. As creepy as it sounds I got my inspirat...
Read more