One Thousand Seven Hundred & Forty Six

Theme: Fear

There’s something really bugging me about Richie. But it’s not Richie. It’s me. I’m trying to put it down to my long list of mental illnesses but when your head is thinking it, you believe it to be the whole truth and that everyone is lying to you. I adore Richie. I’ve fallen really quickly. There’s so many thing’s he makes me feel, and for once, it’s all positive. I’m scared he’s going to abandon me. I’m just going to wake up one day and he just doesn’t want me anymore. I’m scared he doesn’t feel the same way. What if I’m falling to hard and he can’t stand the disgusting sight of me? I don’t think I could survive another abandonment y’know. I’m annoying him. All my insecurities. I’m suffocating him. I want to self harm. I need to punish myself for doing this to him. 

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